Hey Hunter!

Did you go outside today?

© Hunter Stanford 2014

Rose Cottage Hosteria

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Not sure why I waited two more months before adding wings to this fantasyland of a blog. Do you ever say, “Oh hey imma do that right after this”….and that goes on for a few months? It’s especially hard to keep up with things that don’t even matter and on the radar of maybe only my mom and me, such as, well, here.

Anyway, last we spoke I was living the bachelor dream in a slick wood-floor nest in the Chapinero neighborhood of stay-classy Bogotá, Colombia. I took care of two full tourist visas there (for a total of 180 days), made some bomb new friends and even dated a girl. Not a misprint on that last point. Seriously, quit asking, it actually happened… But it was good that phase ended. Bogotá is quite cramped and you tend to get caught up in that fast paced energy and blah blah blah. Plus I just wanted to move on.

A "last of" Bogotá pic. Some of the gang and I hiking outside of Monquí.

A “last of” Bogotá pic. Some of the gang and I hiking outside of Monquí.

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Viviendo en Bogotá

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Where to start? I’ve been trying to take this fantasyland of a blog in a few different directions the past few posts. Maybe focus on just one situation, specific types of interactions and even putting up a little art. This post was going to be a “Hikes of Bogotá” type thing, but some of the hikes ended up being seriously underwhelming so I pulled that plug. W/o another idea we default to the default, which is just a bit of an update on life. After all, the name of the website is my name.

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“So what’s up Hunter?” Great question…but can you raise your hand next time? I am still living in Bogotá (hint hint, title translated) and really haven’t been happier in quite a long time. Since I haven’t had a post about Bogotá since coming, let’s you and I start from the top.

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Actually speaking Spanish

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This is how I imagine things go when I try and speak Spanish, based on the bizarre looks/borderline hostile body language I get back. We’ll do it all in English just to get the joke across.

Welcome all! Cue the curtains. And turn off your damn phone.

Scene 1: with character, Me and character, Citizen hoping to be left alone. I will be Me.

Me: Excuse me sir, how are you today?

Citizen hoping to be left alone: only nods, already wishing I would leave him alone.

M: You know what I can take bus for the is street 59?

Chtbla: scrunches face slowly for a 15 full seconds. What?

M: Ah, I must say it differently and more slowly. Sorry. Flash a smile. Which you know bus I can drink for street 59?

Chtbla: My request ever-so-slowly sinks in. Maybe a full minute has passed, hard to say. YessiryoucangrabthebusthatsaysSINAandtakeittostreet35thentaketheotherwithstreet190onthefronttostreet59…

M: I caught none of that. I hate my life. Possibly you can say this little bit a slower? Thank you.

Chtbla: Character now visibly doesn’t like me and his demeanor seems to imply a request to leave this country and never return. Yes, I said, you…can…take thebusthatsaysSINAandtakeittostreet35thentaketheotherwithstreet190onthefronttostreet59…

M: Quick, act like like you understand so you don’t look dumb in front of this total stranger! Flash an even bigger smile! Ah perfect, much thank you sir, great day you have, yes?

Chtbla: Briefly shows the fakest smile to ever grace the Western Hemisphere and walks off, his dislike for gringos amplified by a minimum of 7-10%. Or that’s how it seems to me. 

Cue the curtains. Start sweeping up the popcorn. This is more or less my experience almost every time I speak to a stranger.

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